The reality of rock bottom

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By Anonymous

They say the only way is up, once you’ve hit rock bottom. But how do you know for sure that where you’ve hit, really is rock bottom?

I thought I’d hit rock bottom back when I was just 16 years old. At the time, I hadn’t ever felt so bad before; the emotional pain was horrendous. It was back then that I made my first attempt to take my life.

I thought afterwards, ‘things will get better from here, because they couldn’t possibly get any worse.’

But they did.

You see, rock bottom is based on things you’ve previously experienced, and you determine that you are there, because it is the worst you’ve felt before. But after that, it is possible to go on and reach a new rock bottom, and sink further than you’ve ever imagined.

5 long, tough years I’ve spent fighting to survive against a brain that’s constantly trying to die. 5 years of my life I’ve been constantly in and out of psychiatric hospitals, each time reaching a new rock bottom.

Now where am I? Right now I’m clouded by the big grey mess that depression brings, still fighting a battle that I’m always convinced I’ll lose one day.

Mental health isn’t something that goes away, once you’ve hit the so called rock bottom. You don’t reach it, then build up nothing but good things afterward. It is a fight for survival that takes time, there isn’t a quick fix.

I know that being around someone who is trying to get through a mental health difficulty is tough. It is so so tough; draining even. But honestly there is hope for everyone, hope that they can recover. Or even manage alot better at the least.

But don’t think it’s something that will go away over night. We all have mental health; every single one of us. It’s just about supporting one another through it and learning that although things are though, there is also still something good in each day. No matter how small.

Don’t give up on someone fighting. You’re not immune and remember that one day, it could be you in the fight.