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0 By Arun Dahiya
If you live with borderline personality disorder (BPD) you may have the idea that your inner critic is the driving force behind most of the maladaptive behaviours.
Generally during childhood,or later, if you were constantly criticised, mocked or punished, it’s very likely that you may have internalised some of those negative statements. Things like: you are not good enough, you are a failure, you will amount to nothing, etc.
Over time this inner critic becomes large and fat due to the experiences we accumulate, how quickly we judge ourselves and our lack of self.
Not good enough
Sometimes our inner critic is that constant noise going on parallel with everything we do. It tries to measure everything we do on an ideal scale. And it feeds on the negative experiences. If you make even a slight mistake then it will be ringing loud in your ear: ‘I already told you so, you can’t do this.’ People with BPD struggle continuously with this due to the inherent core belief that they are not enough.
Many people with BPD have suffered trauma and internalised all those negative self-beliefs. Then the inner critic comes into play and feeds on these internalised beliefs. It drives a lot of BPD behaviours like self-harming, dissociation, splitting, depression, feeling a void etc.
But remember your inner critic is a liar. It is a trickster. You are a human and bound to make mistakes. Challenge your inner critic with the facts and the present. Try to see the actual picture.
Challenge it with positive affirmations about yourself.
Collect together your successes, positive experiences, and with resilience tell your inner critic that it’s a liar.
Keep fighting. Believe in yourself that you are a force of nature. Your inner critic, with time, will become small and won’t be able to stand before you.
Reproduced with permission, originally posted here: anudahiyablog.wordpress.com
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