By Sarah
Do We Let Past Traumas Define us?
I work in the healthcare sector and I have heard a lot of disparaging comments against people with an EUPD diagnosis.
As we get older, we have choices to make. Do we let past traumas define us or not? With things like abuse, it can be very difficult to let go – especially if there was no apology received/ no acknowledgement that you were wronged. It has taken me many years. Did I have EUPD – who knows? What I do know is – building new trusting friendships, taking mirtazapine and praying about it means I am a totally different person to the woman who constantly thought about suicide and repeatedly nearly went through with it or repeatedly self-harmed.
Turning to Mental Health Services
I did start to ask for help a lot from MH services. Yes, of course, I wanted attention and care. Who doesn’t when they feel low? You try to talk to friends but it’s hard for them to relate. Your 20’s are also a time when you find out who your friends are which means losing friends and experiencing disappointments because everyone is dealing with a lot and none of you have much experience in dealing with challenges. You also may experience your first really close relationship outside your family in your 20’s which may drag up all sorts of childhood issues you never knew existed.
Compassion vs Judgement
Coming back to any trauma that was experienced, you scour the internet trying to find people who understand what you have been through. You then turn to Mental Health services, hoping they will have answers for your suffering. Is it so abnormal to want comfort and attention when you are experiencing a lot of pain?
Everyone has scars. People respond a lot better to compassion and understanding than to judgement. We might find EUPD patients frustrating because services are stretched due to lack of funding, amongst other things. But let’s try to lay the blame where it belongs rather than getting angry with patients.
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