Diagnosis Confirmed!

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By Jennifer Catherine

So, yesterday I had a psychology appointment and I got the results back for possible diagnoses. For approximately three years I have been going through the process of figuring out what was going on in my mind. And to finally have some answers is such a relief. It makes me feel like I no longer have to hold on and wait for the official label.

I have Generalised and Social Anxiety, Depression, PTSD, and now, DID.

diagnosis - For approximately three years I have been going through the process of figuring out what was going on in my mind. Now I have a diagnosis confirmed!

It’s ‘normal’

Being told that what I am going through is ‘normal’ and I’m going to be getting the right support to help me in my healing process is just amazing. I can’t tell you when I have ever felt more relieved. DID stands for Dissociative Identity Disorder and used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder. This disorder means that I have more than two distinct identities that are able to come forward in times of stress (or whenever really). They have developed due to childhood trauma. They are the mind’s way of separating memories and emotions as a coping strategy.

Dissociation occurs when you zone out of reality and, I guess, go inside yourself for comfort and safety. Or it can be due to positive or negative triggers. While dissociated memories may be altered or ‘hidden’, identities may switch. Parts of your body or surroundings can feel imaginary or not there at all. Your vision can become blurred; dizziness and headaches are basically guaranteed. Also you can lose track of time, feel like you are someone else or no one at all. Emotions become abnormal, anxiety may heighten, amnesia is possible. Flashbacks of past trauma could arise. And there are many other symptoms.

Road to recovery

I spoke to my therapist about treatment paths. We will be focusing on getting all the different alters (identities) to work as a team and be less of a disturbance in everyday life. Nightmares will be ‘re-scripted’ into happy dreams. Safe places (inside the mind) will be established. Coping strategies for triggers will be tested. And, eventually EMDR therapy could be an option.

I am happy to finally be on this road to recovery but I do know that it will be difficult and time consuming. I am willing to try everything that I can to make my day-to-day functioning as easy as possible, while maintaining the alters and keeping myself happy.

This was just a little update on what is happening for me right now and I hope you all have an amazing day 🙂