By Zoe Thomson
To feel fear is human. If no-one felt fear we’d probably all be getting into stupid situations that would kill us. But when does a fear cross the line and become irrational?
What Are You Scared Of?
We’re all scared of something. For instance, I’m scared of spiders. And why shouldn’t I be? They’re creepy and I can’t stand watching them move on eight legs.
It’s perfectly rational to be scared of heights – what if you fall? But what makes a fear irrational is when it keeps popping up at inconvenient times and manifests itself to whatever situation you’re in. For instance, when there are tons of other logical explanations and reasons, but you cling on to only one – your irrational fears.
The doubts play over and over in your mind. No matter what I try to think about now, my mind will keep retreating back to them. Health anxiety is a big part of my irrational fears.
Find Logical Explanations
The best way to combat these fears is to draw up logical explanations for what is happening. If a friend hasn’t text you back, does it mean they’re in danger? Or could it be that they’re driving, their phone died, or they just didn’t notice the text? When I worked in an office I was always on edge and in constant fear of being fired. I felt like such a letdown. Each and every time my boss asked, “Can I see you in my office?” I’d feel the anxiety kicking in. This is it.
In reality, they would just want a catch up with me, maybe after a holiday or a busy period at work. Sometimes, I’d be in trouble and they’d tell me off, but they never fired me out of the blue. It has happened to people – but to think it would happen to me every time my boss wanted to talk to me was ridiculous.
Chuck Irrational Fears To The Side
For me, that was the greatest way to kick the fears out – calling them out for what they are. Ridiculous.
Anxiety plays a huge part in my irrational thinking but I won’t let it hold me back and control my life. Fight or flight is a natural and normal response to danger, but if I let my irrational thoughts and fears take the wheel on every decision then I’d never progress or get anything done. Learning to recognise them is the first and biggest step, then questioning them, rationalising them, and finally chucking them to one side and never considering them again.
Reproduced with permission, originally posted here: nolightwithoutdarkness
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If only it was that easy, it takes a long time to recognise what fears I am feeling, if they are irrational, and to finally be able to dismiss them is a monster climb. For me it is the acceptance of my fears, and to have strategies ready for when I am fearful that will get me through to the other side in some way. That way, slowly, confidence nibbles away at the edges of fear, and the fears become smaller.