Resilience

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By Gul

Resilience is leaving an abusive home.
Resilience is living in 3 homeless shelters.
Resilience is a 30-minute walk home,
whilst having your first panic attack,
and thinking you’re going to die.

Resilience is trying to write a letter,
to your estranged sister,
and never finishing it.
Resilience is to one day
write again.

Resilience is one step away
from street homelessness.
Resilience is a panic attack.
Resilience is feeling shame.
Resilience is being afraid.

Resilience is sleeping on a kitchen floor.
Resilience is crying at your desk.
Resilience is crying on the bus home.
Resilience is 37.5 hours per week.
Resilience is overtime.

Resilience is telephone counselling.
Resilience is a 3-hour phone call
to the Samaritans.
Resilience is crying on Sunday,
and going to work on Monday.

Resilience is going back
to the department.
Resilience is seeing your GP
and a medicine student.
Resilience is propranolol.

Resilience is moving to a new house.
Resilience is Christmas alone.
Resilience is a tight budget.
Resilience is no social life.
Resilience is hard.

Resilience is wanting to give up.
Resilience is asking for help.
Resilience is a 5-week sicknote.
Resilience is 5 weeks
Alone.

Resilience is being laughed at.
Resilience is being mocked.
Resilience is being ridiculed.
Resilience is being betrayed.
Resilience is being lied to.

Resilience is flashbacks.
Resilience is screaming.
Resilience is trauma.
Resilience is hurt.
Resilience is pain.

Resilience is your sister.
Resilience is going to Mind.
Resilience is 116123.
Resilience is the trunk hugs.
Resilience is the #Littlewins.

Resilience is writing a letter to your GP.
Resilience is your GP calling you back.
Resilience is everything hurting.
Resilience is not being ok.
Resilience is saying so.

Resilience is what makes me
Stronger than my past experiences.
Stronger than my tormentors.
Stronger than my trauma.
Stronger than my PTSD.

Resilience is hope.
Resilience is pain.
Resilience is what
makes me
try again.

Reproduced with permission, originally posted on studentpsychiatricnurse