By Lisa Lewis-Martin
I wonder if you have an Favourite Person (FP) in your life… suffering with Borderline Personality Disorder, you may have, I have! It may be a loved one (Partner) or a family member, or your Best Friend – someone who’s there for you when you need them.
My Favourite Person
My FP is my partner, he’s been with me through the good times, and the extremely bad times. He has seen me Cry, Shout, Raging, at my absolute worst. But he’s also seen me ecstatically happy, loving, laughing, and that’s the best thing, he’s told me, it’s what he loves. He gives me time to do what I want, if I need space, or I need to just shut down. However long it takes, he’s there in the background!
I used to depend on my FP for everything. I couldn’t do anything without him, I’d want him to be there every minute, every day. But now I’ve trained myself to let that invisible rope that ties us go slack because it wasn’t healthy for him, or me, to be like I was. I spend four days with him at his home, and that’s my space too, then the other days, I go back to my space, when I need to switch off, do what I need to do, even if it’s laying in bed on a bad day.
I rely on him
When we’re together he looks after me, cooks for me so he knows I’ve eaten properly, lets me soak in the bath and listen to the music I want to listen to. When we’re apart, he knows it’s important to me that he keeps in touch during the day and evening, else I start thinking the worst eventualities. I still rely on him for lots of things, and can act bad if I don’t get what I want. But I hope he knows I can’t actually control it properly yet and that I don’t want to be bad.
I love my Favourite Person immensely, and and I’m grateful for him every day. I hope I have bought some Sunshine into his life, and I’m sure the best days will just keep on coming!
UNITED STATES
UNITED KINGDOM
[…] are important. If you find yourself a Borderline’s FP, be clear about your needs, motives and feelings, even if your loved one struggles with it. Your […]