By Casey Pipet

“Your mental health is more important than the test, the interview, the family dinner and the grocery run. Take care of yourself.”

Why I Stopped Keeping My Experience With Mental Health To Myself

Let’s talk about mental health

I strongly believe that we all have mental health because, let’s face it, we do! You either have good mental health or ill mental health, or are somewhere in between. I like to look at mental health in a form of a spectrum and we all lie somewhere upon this spectrum. No one will be in the same spot because mental health will be different for everyone. If everyone thought like this then I strongly think that the stigma that currently surrounds this topic would be less. People need to start talking about their mental health, so that’s why I’m writing this post.

Mental health is something that I have struggled with for as long as I can remember. I went through a stage where I used to be sad all the time, but it was so much more than just feeling sad. Like a shell of the person that I used to be, I felt empty. I didn’t know how to cope so I turned to self-harm. This is something that I struggle with to this day.

I kept it to myself

I thought that things were never going to get better and that’s when the suicidal thoughts started to creep up on me. “Why am I still here? Why don’t I just kill myself because people would be better off without me?” These are just two of the thoughts that passed through my head daily. I thought that I was going crazy and I was dead sure that if I were to tell someone they would not understand. And so I didn’t; I kept it to myself, which was possibly one of the worst decisions of my life.

I didn’t tell anyone because this would last for a couple of weeks and then the next thing I knew my mood was extremely elevated. It was like I was on drugs; I felt invincible, almost like I could do anything. I became very confident which was very out of my character. If anything this frightened me more than the stages of depression. It felt to me like a poison and when it started to spread was when I became very elevated for about a week or so.

At last I went for help

I had no idea what was wrong with me because during these periods of elevation I was hardly sleeping but was still full of energy and motivation to succeed in everything. During these stages I was completely out of character and would become obsessive. If I thought something I would stick by it and not let anyone get their opinion in, which is not like me at all. This led to me getting in trouble a lot at school due to the fact I was making impulsive choices. After these periods I would hit a new rock bottom and the suicidal thoughts would start again. It wasn’t until this year that I decided to get help, which has to be one of the best decisions that I have ever made.

I tried counselling but I found it very hard to talk about anything. I was then referred to CAMHS where I had to meet with a specialist doctor and was diagnosed with depression. So I was given medication, which at the start I was a bit nervous to start taking. But I took it anyway as it was help and that was what I needed! Soon after, I was diagnosed as having depression and Bipolar so I was given more medication that I have only recently started taking. So I am still in the process of getting the right medication along with the right dose, so it is safe to say that I still have a long way to go but I will get there!

I want everyone to know that it is okay to talk about mental health and I strongly encourage you to!

If you’re going through hell, keep going!
xx

Reproduced with permission, originally posted on caseypipet


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  1. Tania Stafford 22nd January 2018 at 10:29 pm -

    Casey, thank you for writing this, it will help so many people. Best wishes as you embark on your on-going treatment, many of us are on the same journey, but as you so correctly said we all have a different place on the continuum between mental illness and mental wellness.

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