I was 16 when I was first diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.
I’ve suffered with my emotions for as long as I can remember.
My first hospital admission was when I was 16 years old. It was such a scary experience I didn’t know what was happening. I was really unwell.
Hospital is a scary place but it is also where many people know how to keep you safe.
Unfortunately staff cannot watch you 24/7 unless they think 1-1 observations are required. I was placed on these observations after attempting suicide. It was hard to deal with, being watched when showering or bathing etc..
After trying different medications and therapy I finally started becoming more stable. I was in hospital for almost four years, learning what my illness was and yes it is an illness (it’s not contagious).
The staff try and support you the best they can but they don’t always see the ‘signs’ when someone becomes suicidal or is in a crisis period. It’s sometimes missed.
What I would like to point out is that borderline personality disorder is a horrible illness but it doesn’t define who I am. (Nor anybody else who suffers with it.) I’m still me and I intend to live my life to the fullest.