You slept again this evening. You’ve slept more the last few months, and that is ok. Sometimes I let it get to me, I get annoyed, I make comments. I always regret it. I know you need to sleep.
Need to Sleep
It gets to me because I’m working, looking after the little one and trying to keep up with housework. I want to look after you. I want to give you space to get better. It isn’t that I don’t understand that exhaustion. I’ve done struggling to get out of bed. I did that for a year or so. You never saw that side of me; it was before we met. That side still appears sometimes, and I know that. I think you do too.
However much it gets to me, or bothers me, sleep on. Sleeping is better than some of the other options, trust me. Sleeping so you can get up, smile at the little one, hold them when they want you to (and they do a lot). Sleeping so that your emotional energy is slightly recharged.
We have the rest of our lives to hug each other, to go on trips, to watch our child grow up, and we even have time to watch our family grow. We have time for your idea of family to develop and change; for you to see that my family have joined yours. We are a family now. They want to help you get better. They don’t do it to support me, they do it because you are family too. So sleep on. When you can get up again then we can keep up the fight to get you well. Until then, the reserve army are fighting on your behalf. Until then, I’ll hang up the washing, ignore the hoovering and try to persuade our child to like the bath again. Until then, I’ll watch you play with our little one, making us all smile.
Fight Another Day
While you are sleeping, I’ll love you. I’ll fight for you. While you are sleeping I’ll watch you and cuddle you.
While you are sleeping I hope you get the rest you need inbetween each battle, and live to fight another day. Trust me, that fight is worth fighting. One day might be a bit better than the last.
Editors Note: A number of you have commented about not being able to get enough sleep, I found this book by Colin Espie to be a huge help.