Competing against others, is it really worth it??

By Marcelle McManus

We live in a world where we compete with one another, we try to be better than the one next to us, girls compete to see who looks better, who dresses better and who can get the most likes or views.

We no longer live in a world where we see each other’s inner beauty, instead we look at the outer beauty and compare one another to the ‘law’ of beauty. Therefore we compete for the #1 spot.

You see as I grew older I realized that competing against one another isn’t important, but in all honesty this took me 19 years to learn.

I use to compete against my friends, if it was in school work, I would try and do better than them in tests (now see that’s not so bad because you push yourself to better yourself), but then you get some people who will compete to rub it in other’s faces, and that is a no no. We don’t all excel in all subjects, some of us love mathematics while others love dramatic arts.

I used to compete with my friends when it comes to fashion, but looking back at old photos, what style !! I didn’t have any (working in the fashion industry now made me realize that). But yes I used to compete with style, I would try and look better than my friends and even then, I now realized, some of them just had the fashion bug, always on point.

Let me not get started on the selfie and instagram likes and follows. Ugh, cringe. I used to take so many selfies, thinking back I have no idea how I survived it. Take the best selfies, meant more likes and definitely more followers, but that never happened with me, my selfies would get likes, but my qoutes and inspirational sayings even more.

That’s when I realized that being myself is more important than any like, I mean I love writing and if that is what people like more then that’s what I’m going to do. Be myself.

As I graduated from high school in 2013, and the chapter of adulthood started, that’s when I realized that competing with others isn’t necessary. Yes sure, there were times where I lost myself and still compared myself to some friends, but every time I did, I lost myself in the meantime. I’m not proud of it, but it’s human nature.

Last year, 2016, was the first year that I stopped comparing myself to others and started to focus on myself and building myself up. I also stopped competing against others, because in the end of the day I’m unique and I shouldn’t change that. Likes and followers aren’t important to me anymore. I want to be happy with me, and I don’t need other’s approval for that.

We as women love to compete against one another, I know I’ve said this before but it’s true. I don’t understand why, we are all beautiful in our own way.

Some of us are tall and some of us are short. Some of us are blonde and some of us are brunette. Some of us have blue eyes while others have green or hazel eyes. Some of us are skinny and others curvy. The way we look shouldn’t  define us, it should inspire us to look out for one another.

So often we see guys rating girls from 1 – 10, from ugly to beautiful, and what do we do, we stand there and we let them “judge” our fellow sisters. Why do we not stand up for one another? We should!! We are all placed in different categories by people who don’t even know us personally but judge us by our outer beauty. Why is it that girls these days are seen on social media video kicking, slapping and swearing at one another, why are we allowing this to happen to our fellow sisters ?

I have to say I’m disappointed. We don’t stand up for one another, we compete against one another and if we lose, we don’t even say congratulations to the winner.

This is probably one of my favorite qoutes ever – girls compete women empower.


I believe that we are all beautiful, every single girl and women on this planet. It doesn’t matter what skin color you are, what size you are or how long your hair is, you are beautiful!!

Let’s stand together as women and start fighting for one another instead of against one another.

Reproduced with permission, originally published here

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